Quickies

Stanley’s Resolve

Stanley examined his face in the mirror. I must get rid of these pimples. Then maybe Stanley could have some friends. Even a chance with his blonde cheerleader fantasy, Maryanne. The prettiest girl in school. Built. Like. Hell. But Maryanne already has a boyfriend.... read more

Unassailable

“It’s unassailable. The honour guard watches day and night, always heedful…” “It’ll not be without risk, but she’s penetrable.”Le chevalier de Sémence1was cocksure.If anyone could pull off such a frontal thrust, it was surely him. “Mark my words. Soon Sémence... read more

Fertile

Damned forced overtime, he thought. Why can’t the cheap bastards see that they need to hire at least three more people? The ride home sucked too. Wearily he closed the door behind him and turned to see his wife – in a bordello-red chemise – loping in full, long-legged... read more

The Goldfish Bowl

The Goldfish Bowl No one ever noticed Miriam until the day Mrs. Wrasse spied her coming home with a merman. “What on earth is that?!” demanded Miriam’s elderly neighbor. Beaming, Miriam heaved a sinuous male figure out the trunk of her car. He had a... read more

In the Soup

I: Abandoning the soup opera. I was better off unconscious on that raft. The emaciated amnesiac stared into the orangish VegSoup Sea. If only my “rescuers” were sane… But they weren’t. The Captain’s wife, a boozy big-titted floozy, banged... read more

The Thief and The Garden

Jerry, drunk and coked-up, stared into the darkened porn store. Closed—fuck! I was going to steal a butt-plug and a magazine— High as he was, he could barely hold that thought. Jerry stepped out from the doorway of Eupornia, leered at two young, cornholable women who... read more

Whore’s Borscht: From Erotic Tales of Bolshevik Dining after the Revolution

The People’s Representative of Bolshevik Agriculture, Commissar Dyudovich reported that the spiced red beet that grew in the fields outside Shanghai’s Russian Quarter were prolific and richly-colored as bulbous jewels. He observed that The Red General had... read more

The Village Church

Someone else’s footsteps echoed around the ancient church and I snapped out of my reverie. “Afternoon, Mark. I don’t remember seeing you in here before.” It was Edward, the local vicar. “No, I don’t come to services, well except at... read more

Wicked Wheels

This surely is a wicked set of wheels! We even found some decent music. We’re tooling out of the Smoke at seventy, ‘Feuer Frei!’ blasting from the speakers. Carole passes me a joint and takes off her bra. Out past Reading, we hit eighty and she opens... read more

The Winner

The Winnerby Corvidae”Harry! You crazy bastard, I hear you’re a real fag now!” I bristled instinctively at the words until I registered the note of teasing amusement underneath them. I turned just in time to be tackled in a hug. “Good to see... read more

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