The prostate gland is one of the most overlooked sexual organs, but at Good Vibrations, we think it’s great when men and their partners discover just how much fun it can be!
What Is the Prostate?
The prostate gland is a sexual organ that surrounds the urethra, the tube that urine passes through, just below the bladder. The prostate produces almost half of the fluid that makes up semen and it’s about the size of a golf ball, although it’s not as hard as one. During arousal, the prostate enlarges and swells with fluid, which it expels during ejaculation.
As men age, the prostate can enlarge, which often makes urination difficult since the urethra passes through the center of the prostate. Prostate massage can ease the discomfort and there’s even some evidence that it can reduce the risk of getting an enlarged prostate in the first place! If you’re having difficulty urinating, get checked out by a doctor. All men over 50 should be checked for prostate cancer annually. Men of African descent have a higher rate of prostate cancer and should start getting checked annually at 45.
Why Try Prostate Stimulation?
The prostate is amazingly sensitive and many men enjoy the way prostate play feels. The gland is very similar to the G-spot in women, both in terms of what sorts of stimulation most people like and how it feels. Many men report that prostate stimulation feels less focused than penis stimulation, and that orgasms during prostate play feel bigger, more expansive and more intense.
Anal penetration is part of prostate play (see below) and some men have concerns about anal play and sexual orientation. It may be helpful to remember that what kinds of sensations you enjoy is about where your nerve endings are. Who you want to have sex with is about your sexual orientation. Despite the common myths, these two things aren’t the same at all.
Many men find that exploring the prostate is easier with a little help from a partner or from a toy. You can insert a finger or toy a few inches into the anus and curve towards the navel (upwards if he’s face up) until you find a spot that feels different from the surrounding area. You’ll probably be able to feel the prostate with your finger, especially if he’s turned on and the prostate is engorged. If you’re using a toy, you’ll need to get a little feedback since it can be a bit trickier to tell when you’re on the spot.
Prostate stimulation can sometimes feel like the need to urinate, just as many women find G-spot play can. Try a slightly gentler stimulation and let your body get used to it. You may have some clear fluid come from your urethra. That’s the prostatic fluid getting massaged out of the gland.
Make sure that anything you insert into the anus is smooth, easy to clean, has a base, and is well-lubricated. The anus is very sensitive, so toys with ridges or edges might be too rough. To make cleanup easy, use one of our non-porous toys or cover your toy with a condom. Using gloves is another great way to keep things clean. Anal-safe toys have a base on them to keep them from slipping all the way inside. Many of our lubricants are ideal for anal penetration and remember that everyone needs lube for anal sex.
How to Play With the Prostate
Most men report that they enjoy stroking, rubbing and vibration on the prostate. Try the “come here” motion with your finger, moving your finger in circles, or gently tapping the prostate. Some men also report that a “windshield wiper” motion feels great. You may find that prostate play feels better when you’re doing something else that you enjoy, such as penis massage, masturbation or oral sex. Combining something familiar with something new may help you learn to appreciate something you haven’t tried before.
Many men find that they enjoy stronger prostate stimulation as they become more aroused. If you find that your fingers get tired, or if you want to try a different sensation, check out our great anal sex toys.
Most prostate toys have a gentle curve, just as many G-spot toys do. In fact, any anal-safe G-spot toy may be worth trying for prostate play. You can use the curved tip to create a sliding sensation as it moves in and out. Or angle it into the prostate for a feeling of intense pressure. You can even rotate it from side to side, which is a type of stimulation that fingers can’t do very easily.
You might like the way that vibrators feel on the prostate. Look for one with a strong vibration at or near the tip since that’s the spot that will come into contact with your prostate. Or try one with a vibrator near the base to stimulate the anus while you angle the tip against the prostate.
Many men find that anal plugs are great for prostate stimulation, especially during oral sex or intercourse. Plugs stay in place and leave your hands free for other things. Since the plugs don’t move, you may get more prostate sensations if you move your hips to bring your prostate into contact with the toy.
There are even a few toys designed specifically for the prostate these days. They’re the ideal shape to stay in place and massage the prostate as you move your hips or contract your pelvic floor.
If You Have Medical Issues
If you have medical issues related to your prostate, please ask your doctor about prostate massage or stimulation. It might be just what the doctor orders, or it might not be, so be safe and check with your medical provider first.
Prostate Play checklist
While you won’t always need all of these things, these are some helpful items to have on hand for your prostate play.
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