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Inside the Erotic Mind

This Month's Hot Topic

Remember Your Best Orgasm?
Tell us about it


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Losing Your Virginity

Fiction Versus Reality



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From Anonymous
I'm 29, and I gave my virginity away to one of my brothers' best-friends (who is 36). We've been together now and in love, secretly, for six months. He is my first true love! He was so gentle and pleasing; I actually came about four times before intercourse. Ooh, he gives such good cunnilingus! Anyway, before we began intercourse, he kissed and licked the entrance to my vagina (I'll never forget the sensation!) and rubbed his erect penis against my clitoris moving me into another orgasm. In the middle of this orgasm, he squeezed my clit as he slowly entered my vagina. The sensation sent me over the edge and even though I felt the fullness of his penis, I felt no pain. When he began thrusting, I surprised both of us by contracting around him until we both came to climax together.

That morning, I was very sore. After we did it again and slept a few more hours, he drew a warm bath for me and massaged all my sensitive areas. I never imagined my first time to be so beautiful!

From Anonymous
Losing my virginity sucked in the worst way. I was 15, at a party and had fallen asleep (passed out?). Next thing I knew my "date" was pushing himself inside me. Yes, this is date-rape folks. Not fun. I don't remember bleeding but I can tell you it hurt for days and I could barely sit the next day. When I finally did choose to have sex I had no problem being intimate at all. That surprised me because my first experience was so horrid. My first "chosen" experience was kind of awkward but he was older and had more practice so was able to help me along.

I kind of envy women who choose when and to whom they wish to give their virginity to. When I read those romance novels (past-tense) they piss me off because they just seem so phony. I know my experience was hardly the norm (although I'm shocked at how common date-rape actually is) it still doesn't seem like anyone could not just scream from the pain of it. I guess it's true for some people though since I'm reading about here on the site. Anyhow, those are just some of my thoughts on it...

From Anonymous
I was nervous. Mainly because of hearing about pain and bleeding and such but I had NO pain (yes, I was tight and it took some effort and stretching for him to get inside all the way, being fairly well endowed, but no pain) no blood. No soreness that I recall the next day. And the next time no discomfort at all either. 

I really wish I had been able to relax more and not have had these ideas in my head. Would have been much better. But apparently, many girls DO have some or even a lot of pain, so I won't say those stories were "myths", but for me, as it turned out, they did not apply. I either was born without or with a thin hymen or lost it along the way; I masturbated quite a lot and from an early age, but I sure don't recall any particular episode which might have been a torn hymen. 

I've read that there are vast differences in hymens between different populations and individuals within populations, to the extent that some tend to have very thick and pronounced hymens (the speculation was that over much time, cultures which prize this feature tend to select for it so it becomes more common) and others tend to have little or only a residual hymen (according to this study author, ALL girls have a hymen, even if it is virtually undetectable and with no need to be torn.)

Anyway, I didn't come (but then, I don't come from intercourse alone even now, I need clitoral stimulation instead or along with penetration) and that first time, we were both so focused on the intercourse aspect that a few kisses aside, nothing else was going on! It wasn't a "fairy tale" scene, a bit awkward and sort of anti-climactic, all in all. But wonderful still, very intimate and pleasurable (not orgasmic for me, but yes, felt good to have him inside me.

This is an awesome forum! So great to read everyone's experiences.

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