Losing Your Virginity

Fiction Versus Reality

I was reading a few romance books to take my mind to another place. One thing I noticed was that when these women lost their virginity, the pain only seems to surface for a second before the feeling turns into earth shattering pleasure. However, when I read other types of literature, I learn that this not true. The woman usually doesn't have a whole lotta fun and it takes a couple of tries to get the earth shattering feeling that these romance women get in just a few seconds.

Did anyone out there have romance book type experiences where the guy knows what he's doing to the the woman when it is her first time? Did the pain turn to pleasure quickly? How about the guys? Men are almost always portrayed as knowledgeable and experienced. We know that's hardly the case. Don't be shy, tell us: were you nervous, uncomfortable, was your partner helpful, or scornful?    —Alyn Rosselini

I always thought of losing my virginity as a career move.   —Madonna

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From Anonymous
My first time was not the best way one should loose their virginity. I was 16, and he was 23. My boyfriend wasn't nice or understanding about the whole situation. He pressured me into having sex with him until finally one night I did.

It was the most horrible night of my life. My boyfriend wasn't on the small side so that was one thing going against me...he barely got the tip in good. I tried to push him off because it hurt so badly, but he didn't stop. After he finished I got dressed and went home. I was soo sore and I bleed for 2 weeks after that, and every other time we had sex. I truly regret it till this very day, but I can't change the past.

From Ghost Rider
Come on people. Be serious. A person doesn't lose their virginity. They give it away. If they lost it, you would be able to go down the street and find it laying on the sidewalk, or get in the car and find it laying there where it dropped when they got out. This is a very tired and over used statement.

From Suzie
Wow, I'm kinda jealous of everyone that's written that at least knew when they'd lost their virginity! I'm 23 now and in a fantastic sexual relationship, but I have so many fantasies about losing my virginity - those unrealistic romance novels turn me on, even though I know they're not accurate.

I've always been very sexual, and when my partner and I got together it wasn't long before we were touching and doing oral sex and things like that, then as soon as I was on the pill I wanted him inside me. Trouble was, even though he's nearly twenty years older than me, he's still fairly inexperienced and wasn't that confident. I was tight and he couldn't get inside me, but the thought made him come real quick, so we had to stop trying. We tried a few more times with no success. Then I thought I'd lost my virginity when I could feel that he was well between my lips and I asked him afterwards 'What just happened?' and he said 'You know what' - I was left thinking, 'well, that wasn't so bad, but it wasn't so good either!' Later I realised that he hadn't actually been inside me at all! He just meant that I'd made him come!

Clearly, this wasn't so satisfactory, so we decided to try and relax my muscles, which I now realise were not abnormal, thanks to reading everyone else's postings. So I lost my virginity to a small vibrator...hardly the fantasy scenario. That did hurt - a lot, but really turned me on as well. Eventually he got me loose and wet enough that, after being together sexually for over a year, he finally managed to get inside me. I loved it, the thought of it, the feel of his hips so close to mine etc, but I couldn't help wishing losing my virginity had been a bit different.

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