Is Phone Sex Cheating?

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From Counsel
The problem, of course, is that this is a subjective issue--meaning what is "cheating" for one person may not be "cheating" for another.

However, there may be some objective issues that one has to deal with regarding "phone sex"- namely that the time and attention given to the "other" party is time and attention you divert from your current relationship. That time and attention will affect your current relationship.

The emotional attachment given, if it is, to that "other" person is emotional attachment that is detracted from your current significant other--usually since the new other is "exciting" as in all "new" relationships.

Perhaps the real question is, "Why don't you work to make your current sexual life as exciting as the Phone Sex you find so exciting?"

From Gemstone
I happen to be in a relationship and love my partner. But our sex life has dramatically decreased since he started working nights. I can't even remember the last time we had sex more then 2 times in a week. I have a very high sex drive.

One night I was on the talking to a male freind of mine. We have a very good chemistry but I never intended on being anything but friends. We started talking and next thing I know I'm having phone sex for the first time. I have done it three times total and I don't think it's wrong because it's just a way for me to get off without being physical with someone other than my partner. I'm never going to have sex with the guy and I dont have any feelings for him.

I think phone sex is a good and one of the best alternatives to cheating when sex is lacking in a relationship. I only do it when I feel really pent up. My partner doesn't know I do it because I know he would be mad. But if it were him and I wasn't able to satisfy his sexual urges I would be grateful if all he is doing is phone sex.

From Lance Gable
I ask this question to myself; Is phone sex cheating? And after reading some of your messages, I came to the conclusion that NO its is not cheating. It's just one of the highest forms of masturbation. Yup, that's all it is folks.

For those who get caught up in a relationship over phone sex. well that's a different topic. Now your talking about phone sex in the household, or phone sex with a different person while being married. Hey buddy that's cheating! Cyber, phone, and web cam becomes all cheating!  Shit evening masturbating becomes cheating! "Can a guy get a fucking break! No! Because your ass is married and  you're bringing a whole new entity into y'alls lives. Notice that I said y'all lives, not yours!

So, is phone sex cheating? If you're married yes. Girlfriend and boyfriend, NO! ... but why Lance? ... because a man whom is not married will do whatever it takes, that pleases him on his own leisure time. (no thoughts of girlfriend, always  partying, drinking brews, and making girls, strip clubs, lap dances, and showing your ass to world.)

So listen, phones sex is just a fantasy. So when I'm with her it's all about her, *and not me*. You see the difference?

You're here to explain what phone sex did to your relationship with your mate, and that's not the topic ladies. The topic is did your mate physical cheat on you? And no he/she didn't.

Phone sex is cyber sex with out typing! I'm getting off, he/ she is getting off, that's all that matters! who said anything about relationship. duhhhhhh!

This has nothing to do with my woman or whoever I choose to have phone sex with, I'm in a state of mind of masturbation, and getting off! yeeeeeeah

From Ravenwoman
I think that if both partners are aware of and ok with it, then no, of course it's not "cheating". Even if the partner ISN'T aware of it, I would hesitate to call it cheating. Is it cheating to watch porno? To masturbate, with or without some form of erotic material involved (pictures, words, sounds, fantasy?) Am I cheating when I read and write erotica? I certainly don't "confess" to my partner every time I masturbate...that is just a private aspect of my sex life that I don't feel any need to share.

I don't see phone sex with a paid professional as cheating. Now, anytime there is more of a connection on an emotional or in person physical way, yes, I would consider THAT cheating (assuming the other partner didn't know or wasn't fine with it)

I've never done it myself, but I wrote a story once about it (and in my story, the callers end up meeting and go on to carry on an affair, both over the phone and through the rare meeting) and it was pretty darn hot, in my opinion and from what my readers said. I think "dirty" talk and explicit masturbation scenes turn a lot of us on, big time. 

I may have to try it sometime myself, and I'd have to do it with someone other than my partner, as I don't think he'd be into it. But who knows? Maybe he would be...we've simply not had very many separations in our time together, so never really had any need or chance to try it.

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