Taking Care of Business

On the sly...or so you think

How many of us (male or female) have done the hand shag and thought we were along - but weren't. Or perhaps we were lying next to our significant other and thought they were asleep? And did they wake up or ever mention they knew you were doing it?

A long time ago I had a girlfriend who really wasn’t much fun and kind of mean - I did, more than once, but never since. She said something one time that suggested she really wasn't sleeping but by then I didn't much care. —Jake

We have reason to believe that man first walked upright to free his hands for masturbation.—Lily Tomlin

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From Cheryl
In my marriage I masturbated regularly early on, even though my husband could get me off multiple times. I've made myself come after sex, or just late at night when I could not sleep. I would masturbate quietly while my husband slept next to me. Now, after 25 years, neither of us is embarrassed to masturbate in front of each other; although my husband does it more often (in private and with me) than I am inclined to do.

From Oxartes
Eek, this is embarrassing. Y'all be the judge if this qualifies. A couple of years back, we came home late and went to bed. I was horny. Mrs. Oxartes knew this but was really zonked. She apologized, rolled over and was out. I didn't want to wait. I saw her nice round derriere (Mmm...) and, as lightly as I could, rubbed my cock against it. I didn't want to wake her so I took my time. When I let fly, I rolled over onto my back. I've done this several times since. I don't know whether Mrs. Oxartes knows or not. If she does, she hasn't let on.
 
From Anonymous
Of course I have. Yes, of course he would awaken. Sometimes he would join in, sometimes help, sometimes watch, sometimes politely pretend to be sleeping. Thankfully, I have never been associated (for long) with someone who took offence.

From Beth
Middle age has been a surprising, and pleasant, erotic awakening for me. Ever since I passed 40, my libido has been heating up, while my husband's has been cooling. We still have great sex together, but he can't quite keep up with me any more. As a result, I've been masturbating more often ­ probably as much as, maybe even more than, I did when I was a teenager. It's not a secret between us. He knows I do it, and is always happy to help if I ask. But sometimes I just want to be alone ­ just me and my fantasies.

Orgasm is the greatest sleeping aid of all, and I like to have one in bed each night to end the day. He's a light sleeper, though, so I have to be still and quiet. It's like being back in college, trying to masturbate without letting your roommate know what you're doing ­ no sighs, no hip thrusts, no creaking bed springs, no vibrator, just my hand in my panties, circling gently away. It's not that he would be mad if he woke up and saw what I was dong. Quite the opposite ­ he would want to help me. But what I want at those moments is to be alone, and undisturbed. So I've gotten quite good at the silent orgasm ­ a middle-aged woman masturbating again the way she did when she was back in college.

From Bernie
My wife and I have both masturbated beside one another in bed while each thought the other was asleep. It's really the only sex we get these days. I'll look over and see one hand massaging a nipple and the other working her clit under the covers several nights a week. That gets me rock hard and I must of course stroke myself and fondle my sack. Never to orgasm, I'd rather avoid explaining the mess. Do I ever offer to join her? I'd love nothing better then to bury my face in her pussy and lick and suck her clit until she writhed in orgasm but those days are a distant fading fast memory.

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