What About Strap-Ons?

My girlfriend and I just got one, and yes, she uses it on me (I'm a guy). I don't have any desire to be with a man, trust me I've worked this through, but that's not precisely what I'm commenting on. We bought a really good strap-on and though we don't use it every night we do take it out for special occasions. When extra-kink is what the doctor orders.

Usually during sex I'm the more dominant partner BUT once in a while I like the tremendous rush of vulnerability that comes from being submissive to her. She gets a major kick outta having 8 inches of phallus to heave about and she says she like the dominance that she feel it brings out in her. It was her idea to get the thing but it only occurred to her after I introduced her to good anal sex.

Anyhow, I'm wondering are there other couples or people out there who like this? I'd like to hear other perspectives on this and any advice other's might have: Like what's the thrill for them, does size matter? And what contexts, or roll-plays might others be into? I'm doing some fiction writing right now and I'd find the feedback useful.

Thanks ... and God bless the ERWA folks for their providing this forum!    —Festus

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From Anonymous
My wife is only into very plain vanilla sex, but I would love to be bent over, tied to some apparatus, blindfolded, gagged, paddled mercilessly, then fucked in my ass by her with a large strap-on. Alas.

From Fabienne
In all the letters I have read in this section, I haven't seen any involving two women. I have only recently been introduced to the world of Sapphic Love, but I am enjoying it.

Not long ago, while enjoying an afternoon of oral love making, I casually commented that a nice hard dick would be good right about now. Sort of like a brandy after a good meal. Without saying a word, my partner left the room. She returned a few moments later sporting a strap-on. Now I have heard of these and even seen them in catalogs, but this was my first encounter with one. It had no bulky harness. It was more like an old-fashion girdle, with the dildo poking through from the inside.

The "penis" was very flexible. Not at all like the hard, rigid ones I'd seen in movies. I laid back and closed my eyes as she opened my legs and rubbed the head between my pussy lips, not unlike a man would to spread the moisture. As she eased into me, the feeling was identical to the real thing. Only when she pressed her soft, feminine body against mine did I know it wasn't a man.

I was in heaven! Being filled with a cock and feeling the soft, yielding body of another woman. I may never go back to men again.

From B.B.King
Strap-ons are great. For years I had been willing to experience the passive side of sex, but I'm straight and I couldn't be with another man. One day, my girlfriend was on my back and she started to pretend she was fucking me. I was aroused by her movement and by having her on me. Slowly, we started to play more, and she started to finger me while she was sucking me. I had a couple of very strong orgasms that way. Then, more jokes and ideas...

One day, I decided that I couldn't wait anymore, and I went into town to get a 6" strap-on dildo. At first, I was a bit scared by the girth of it, but I just needed to relax and enjoy it. My girlfriend, usually very calm and submissive, really enjoys being in charge, being in control, being the one fucking me. We try several positions all the time, doggiestyle, me on top just taking it in, me lying on my belly while she pounds me, but the best position is me lying on my back, so that I can put my legs on her shoulders and look at her shagging me, her breasts bouncing, her eyes darkened and looking right at me. I love the way she does me. The feeling on the prostate is simply undescribable, like an orgasm-magnifier, and the role reversal is absolutely mind-blowing! My quiet, shy girlfriend turns into a real sexy stud! Try it, try it, try it!

From Belle
We are in our early forties when hubby and I had an ernest discussion about kinky sex and its role in our lives. It resulted in us buying a ten inch strap on. It eventually arrived and hubby dressed up in my stockings and garter belt, I strapped myself up and duly fucked his ass and he was in seventh heaven, he loved it! 

Since then we have joined a local strap-on group, our collection of strap-ons numbers over a dozen, all lengths and girths, and I have a small group of men all ages whom I anal fuck at regular intervals at our group meetings, held in our homes and of course they are fair so the guys in return give me a regular fuck once I'm done with them.

I pussy fuck another half dozen or so women, ages 23 to 64, many married to the men I anal fuck. What a change to our lives strap-ons have made, hubby and I haven't looked back!

From Clint
I love it when my wife has a couple of drinks and indulges my little fantasy of role reversal. She will get me all hard and worked up and ask me if I am a little whore and a slut. Of course I will always say yes.. About that time she asked if a want a cock in my mouth tonight to suck so she can watch.. I tell her yes usually while I am fucking her.. At that time she usually gives me an order to go get her cock from the closet and as I go to retrieve it she is usually telling me im a dirty little slut and that I should hurry if I want cock to suck.. 

She is standing when I return and makes me kneel and hold her 8 inch strap-on on in position so she can step into it.. After I pull it up her waist I am told to strap it down tight to her so she can really fuck my face and ass hard.. By this time she usually has my cock pulsing with blood and throbbing. About the time I pull it tight she tells me to get some panties on and suck her cock.. I do... 

I love this game and the whole aspect of role reversal and name calling drives me crazy.. I usually laugh soon after I have shot my load and she is driving that cock up my ass and telling me I am a cock sucking whore.. She has learned that the more verbal she is the more excited I get.. She will ask questions about how much I love cock and tell me I look great with a big fat cock in my mouth.. god I love her.

From Tony
My girlfriend and I have been together for over a year now, and we're to be married in a little over a month. Recently in the bedroom she has been using her fingers to penetrate me, and it feels so very good. I lay on my back and sometimes I grab her hand and force her fingers deeper into me. I love it! She says she loves doing it and when she gets into it she talks dirty and makes me come even harder! 

I have had a recent desire to have her use a toy on me, I'd really love her to use a strap-on but I'm also a believer in small steps. I have no idea on how to approach her with this. I'm comfortable talking with her about everything but this, it's frustrating. I think I'm just going to have to blurt it out one day. Any suggestions?

From Keith
My wife has used a dildo and a vibrator on me a few times while she stroked me to an orgasm. It's a fantastic sensation. I'm hoping to convince her to try a strap on to make the experience last longer.

From Love it in the Rear
My wife has always liked to stick her fingers in my ass, and I really enjoy it to. One day I brought home a strap-on and I could see the excitement in her eyes. We both could not wait to try it out. She made me get on my knees and suck own her big cock (as she calls it) until she came. Then she leaned me over the dresser in front of the mirror so she could watch herself fuck me in the ass. I came without any other stimulation, just the expression on her face and her cock in my ass. She said the power trip from having her own cock is something she cant explain and says every women should try it.

From Uptoplay2
I now know two women who liked the idea of strap-on play enough that they went ahead and purchased a Feeldoe. [double headed dildo]Their husbands, who had never said a word about any interest in strap-ons, upon seeing them playing with the feeldoes decided on the spot to bend over. For me, the feeldoe adds a new dimension to the strap-on play. Namely, the woman is really feeling it! 

Whatever kind of toy you use be sure to do it safely and with serious thought to cleanliness!

From Michelle
I've had a committed boyfriend of a while now and am interested in bringing a facet into our relationship I really think he would like, namely anal toys. My problem is with my boyfriend's own personal issues with sex in relation to what goes and what he vetoes. Which is a whole other story entirely.

He does enjoy anal play and usually asks I penetrate him during each sexual encounter we have with my finger. The stimulation brings him to incredible orgasm and he is very affectionate during the act. My boyfriend can be an annoying paradox at times. He runs of the cliff running and screaming with some things and with others he is very guarded and coldly dismissive.

My boyfriend's major qualm that is slightly frustrating me now is his attitude towards sex toys. Once we started dating he asked me to throw away mine...I of course refused which led to a ridiculous fight. I am very interested in making things pleasurable for him and have found that since he is very fond towards anal play he would enjoy other forms of stimulation as well.

Not so. I have only managed on two occasions to successfully bring him to complete orgasm with the use of sex toys in which he was not uncomfortable, and expressed extreme gratitude afterwards. A butt plug and vibrator. He did deeply enjoy these two occasions and it is from his enjoyment with this that I am being slightly stubborn about the strap-on. I know it would be a no no to spring something like a strap-on on him during sex and I sat down with him for a calm and open discussion about what I would like to do and why.

He was of course very very reluctant and I know he is now wary of me trying this unwillingly, which I would never do. We all have our sexual no goes and I respect his, however I do believe he will be missing out on something he could grow to love and I would like to give it one last try before throwing in the towel. Does anyone have any advice for having this discussion, any tips would be incredibly welcomed.

From Reilly
About five years ago, my partner told me about a dream she had the night before. She is not too adventurous and though sex was good it sure seemed like we were missing some fun. She told me that she had dreamed that I was on a table on all fours and she was fucking me with a large black dildo that she held in both hands. 

As the next year went by she began touching my ass and would occasionally put her finger a little way into my asshole while she masturbated me. One night, after she had more than she was used to to drink, she rolled me over on my stomach with surprising force, climbed on my back and proceeded to thrust her clit against my tailbone very hard. She came within 30 seconds. 

Another few months went by and I asked her if she ever thought about her dream. She had completely forgotten about it and seemed somewhat surprised and embarrassed. A few days later though, sure enough, she asked me if she should buy a toy so that we could "try" her dream. I got an instant erection and said I thought it was a pretty good idea. She came home a few days later with a dildo about the size of my penis and, surprisingly, a black leather harness. 

At first, she had no idea how excited I was but as she applied lubrication with her finger and felt me shaking with anticipation she really stepped up her intensity and started telling me how she was going to fuck me and I'd know what it felt like to get fucked really hard. It was great- she came again from pressure on my back and reached around and brought me to an orgasm so intense I saw stars. 

But we have only done it 3 or 4 times since in the past 2 years and she is very noncommittal when I ask her about it frankly. Sex is less frequent though still quite good but I want to be bent over...

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