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From Anonymous
I'm a 23 yr old girl who has the same insecurities as most girls on this page. I slept with 3 people before my boyfriend. I never really thought of my labia as being different until my boyfriend of 2 years said to me "you have the pussy of a porn star" I wasn't sure how to take that. And then he said "I bet it wasn't like that when you were a virgin." But the truth is, yes it was like that when I was a virgin. I see no change from then to now. 

I think men think you are a slut if you have a large labia, when that has nothing to do with it. Men really need to realize that it doesn't mean we have slept with a lot of people. And to all you girls afraid to have sex. Don't be! Sex is amazing. Tell the guys to take it or leave it. Accept who you are and you will find a guy who will love everything about you. And I'm happy to see plenty of men find it irresistible

From Anonymous
I recently had surgery to reduce the size of my large inner vaginal lips because one side was longer, and it was uncomfortable many times as it chaffed in my underwear. In addition to physical discomfort, I did not like the way my labia looked. Quite frankly they looked ugly to me. I learned to be pretty comfortable with my physical features when it came to intimate relationships. Except for my boyfriend sometimes got lost finding my vaginal hole, or when the longer labia got in the way, they didn't really pose a problem. But I was uncomfortable with this part of my body for a long time. I felt different and insecure in this area. 

To make a long story short, I am so much happier now every time I look between my legs and see beautifully shaped, much smaller inner lips. It is a relief from a physical and emotional pain that I lived with every day. I would say surgery is not for everyone, but if you are truly uncomfortable and feel inferior due to large or misshaped inner vaginal lips. I would say don't limit yourself from a fairly simple procedure that can literally change your life. (I say it can change your life because sexuality is so tied up with identity in our culture/world). 

My one piece of advise is to do your research and find a doctor that has a lot of experience and a good reputation for good results.

From Jessy
It is so good to finally see a site like this. When I was younger, I was very insecure about my inner lips. They are longer than my outer lips and a little uneven. They have a slight grayish color at the edges. I would look at these girls in magazines and see their tiny vaginas, with hardly any labia at all, and they were completely even-toned and pink, I thought there was something wrong with me. I finally got up enough courage to actually show my mom my vagina at age 16. She actually started laughing, because I had constantly told her of my insecurities about it, and she said she expected my inner lips to be dangling 6 inches down (and even that isn't abnormal). she told me that I was perfectly normal, and I was beyond relieved. My insecure came back when my best friend saw my vagina, and in disgust said, "ewww! your vagina looks so different from mine!" I wanted to punch her.

I've been with plenty of guys and no one had ever said one word about it, and that makes me feel better. But I have heard that some guys think that the bigger the girl's lips are, the more men she's been with, which is so completely wrong. I look the same as I did before I ever had sex. I've also seen sites dedicated to larger vaginas, which is wonderful, because we are all beautiful.

Thank you so much! I only wish there was information like this when I was 13!

From Succulent
Wow, I'm soooo glad I found this site. My exposure to most porn mags, and pics on the internet (which I look at to see what a man's ideal is) feature women with perfect little lips. As I compare myself, I feel flawed.

I was shaving today and it was so frustrating to keep those damn lips out of the way! My labia minora is small (I keep trying to stretch it to cover my full majora lips!) and the inner lips protrude. I found myself thinking, "yuck!", but I know this message of hatred toward my body is wrong! 

My vagina gives me SO much pleasure - I can have an orgasm from the stimulation any outer part of it from the clit, to over the opening, to the middle, to the sides - and they're all slightly different. 

Why does the media try to put women into little self-defeating boxes - let's free and enlarge our minds...love your pussy!

From Ginger Anne
Frankly, what I want to know is what asshole decided what constituted a "pretty" vagina? I will bet he has an ugly penis! So there!

And, how many people are really going to see it anyway?! It is not as though any of us live in a society where we walk around with no pants and our legs spread open! I have larger labia. I love them. They are soft and full and both my boyfriend and I enjoy playing with them. Really. Haven't our insecurities gone too far at last?

From Susan from Canada
I just stumbled upon your website and I am so glad I read it. I too have felt rather self conscious about my rather 'meaty' labia. After reading your column though, I have to thank your male contributors in particular. The gentlemen who said they were so 'turned on' by very obvious labia and clitoral viewing made me feel that my private parts are indeed very sexy and sought after by more than just a few of the male population. 

Personally, I have always loved a man wanting to spread me wide open to get a better view and then taking in a mouthful. It was great to read some of you find it sexy. I will never feel 'less than' ever again.

From Anonymous
I too am blessed/cursed with larger inner labia. I actually think it may be that my outer labia are just small. I have never really liked the way my labia looked for as long as I can remember. I am now 40. After having 2 children they seemed to have gotten a little bigger. I have seriously thought of having labiaplasty. However my fiancé says if I do he will leave me. 

I have never had any man complain about them but I also haven't really displayed them. Before my fiancé I was pretty much a sex in the near dark kinda girl. He says he loves the way I look down there and that I should be happy with what God gave me.

From Anonymous
Ok, so here is my rant about body image and large labia, etc. I've always thought that my inner lips were large but for a long time I just didn't care and every time I messed around with someone, they never seemed to care either. I dated someone for 2 years whose only experience with naked women was porn and he only once asked if my lips were normal and I just said I guess and it never came up again but he was still obviously very turned on by me.

Then after I broke up with that boyfriend, I messed around with someone new and he seemed really into me but mentioned to his friend, which got back to me, that he thought that my lips were large. I was hugely offended even though he never said they were gross or bad and still always tried to mess around and have sex with me. For several years after that I was always very self conscious and would constantly ask guys if they thought I was gross or hated me now because they saw how I looked and pretty much all of them would just react stunned and not even know what to say. Many would just say shut up, you have the hottest pussy ever and would think I was fishing for compliments.

A later ex-boyfriend of mine was very patient with me and would always assure me that I wasn't gross or "deformed" as I started to say, and would constantly ask me why I would be gross just because my labia were a little big. Then (sorry I'm almost done with my stories before I get to my point) throughout my freshman year of college, I would always say you think I'm weird, you think I'm gross, etc while messing around with someone and they would always act confused and assure me I wasn't and I was still stuck on this then finally this one guy, frustrated with me said, "The only thing that's weird about you is the fact that you think you're weird." And then I realized that maybe he was right and maybe I had been overreacting all this time.

Now, not to say that I'm not self conscious anymore, because I still am, but I realized that confident guys who have actually gotten around and have seen different vaginas realize that there is no normal. This goes for everything...there is no normal and I think people just need to realize that they are who they are and maybe they're not perfect but seriously, who is perfect?

After I became hung up on this idea of being gross and deformed, I haven't had the same intensity or ease of climaxing and I think it's definitely because unconsciously I am stuck on the fact that I'm gross. And I think confidence is what will ultimately turn the other person on, and definitely saying "I'm so gross, etc" will not do anything but kill the moment or make the person look for something that's gross on you if anything.

Anyway, even if there is something about you that isn't considered beautiful by someone, there will be someone else out there that does find you beautiful and ultimately the longest lasting and most loving relationships come when people are themselves and appreciated for who they are.

From Chink
You see.. I could read these all day and still feel the same. It's not that I'm uncomfortable with my one larger inner labia. It's that it causes so much discomfort.. I have to put it in between my outer lips so it doesn't slide against anything because it's very uncomfortable and hurts. Not only that, but there is a beauty mark on it.

But it seriously does cause a lot of pain. And I hate it.

From Jane
I'm living in the US today but in 1975 I was in the UK, married, two months after the birth of my second, getting my sexual juices running again only to be bitterly disappointed with my husband's girth. My vagina was the size of the Hudson Tunnel and my husband was not overly well endowed so I did not feel anything when he entered my vagina. 

I was one of the first in the UK to have an operation to reduce the diameter of my vagina. It was painful, it was expensive (a special Christmas pressy from hubby) but once I was able to restart vaginal sex, it worked a treat! I could at long last feel him! Hubby was neither long nor fat but that was exactly the sensation I got as he rode in and out of me, his cock felt like a wine bottle in there, my orgasms had returned! 

I'm now in my early sixties, we are still married, we have big libidos, we have amazing one-on-one sex, and on high days and holidays we swing with some old horny marrieds like us, some of the very nice friends we've made in our 25 years residence in the US!

From Don
Chuckling here. I am blown away by the messages on this string from women indicating that their lips are so big that they are:

- hard to manage
- visible bulges in swim suits or tight pants.

Ladies, if you see that as a problem try managing a full cock and balls. I never even worried about it until I saw those messages. Gad! Should I be concerned that my granddaughter refers to my Speedo as a 'banana hammock'? Should I opt for cockplasty to make it more manageable and less visible? I think not.

Gosh I do wish all you women would learn that you are all beautiful just the way you are.

From Sam
Hmm, John [see John's entry below] you're a bit off on this 'used' look. The size of the labia or clit has nothing to do with use. If it did, porn stars would have labia hanging down to their knees. Labia size and other vagina variants are the same as penis variations; it's simply what we're born with. You know how it goes: brown eyes, blue eyes, large labia, small penis, etc.

From John
I like small ones actually, Big are ok, no problem, just I like the look of a vagina that looks as though it hasn't been used a lot.

From Sonia
I think a lot of men form these negative views on large female genitalia because they look at too much porn and don't have enough sexual experience. I also think this is probably a view of my generation(y). Just as small breast were found more attractive during the twenties, etc.

From Dionne
I am so glad I found this site. I am 24 years old with very big vagina lips and clit. I noticed that I was different after the birth of my son at 19. My vagina is lips are so big and I was self-conscious about them for ages because although I am slim and petite there is a big bulge that shows through my underwear or swimsuits. 

However the last few guys that I have been with have absolutely loved them which has made me feel better around men and sexually, however I am still very self-conscious in public and will not wear tights trousers, swimsuits etc

From Yellow
I'm 16 years of age with a very large uncomfortable labia and have been self conscious about them for god knows how long. It's just hard to do everyday things...walking, sitting, kneeling going to the washroom. It does upset me to the point that I can't function anymore and I am going to get labiaplasty done because I do feel it's the only way I'll be able to think clearly again. 

I know a lot of people will read this and go..why you're only 16 what are you thinking you nut job? But for those who know what it feels like for this to take over your life you know what I'm talking about. I've gone through therapy about my physical appearance for many many many years and I still can't get over it.

I'm sooo excited to hear many young girls and women here love their labia it is so lovely to hear! I hope one day I'll be able to love my labia as a lot of you do.

From Anonymous
I hate mine. My labia minora protrude and my whole vulva isn't even the same colour as the rest of my body. I doubt I'll ever have sex, just because I HATE the way it looks and I feel that any guy I'll be with will hate it, too.

From Joe
To all the ladies that have a giant clitoris and labia, bless you! You're a rarity and a cherished commodity! Sexual stimulation begins with the visual and then continues to build. To see clearly ones labia, and a very large protruding clitoris is the most stimulating of all. As I love giving oral to a woman you can imagine the turn on for me, and for her! I only wish all woman had a large clitoris, the larger the better, and large labia.

From Dorothy
Frightening trend, I'd say. I have a teenager living with me who is convinced that her genitalia are ugly. I had her go to that mega-vulva web site and pick out the one that looked the most like her (she was too shy to show me). It convinced her that she isn't deformed, but she still thinks she's ugly.

Good grief. As if we were screwed enough with our breasts being too big/small, our hair being too straight/curly, etc., ad nauseum. Frankly it had never even occurred to me to be concerned about whether or not I looked good from the view up my skirt, so I asked my hubby if he had ever met a vagina he didn't like. He said all he's ever thought, as he settled in for a viewing was, "God, I'm lucky to be here." "Damn that looks tasty." "Oh boy, oh boy, oh boy, oh boy."

It saddens me that women would actually consider surgically "improving" what they got. I've never heard of a guy thinking about getting a bigger dick, although I have heard them complain. Come to think of it--isn't there some kind of operation to add fat to a penis to make it thicker? Would any of you guys consider it?


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