This Season's Best Movies
Porn, parodies & passion
2014 AVN Winners
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sexy spoofs on mainstream stuff
Titles are linked to our favorite adult movie sites where you can buy, rent, download-to-own, or watch VOD. We recommend the following sites for adult entertainment:
Men In Black: A Hardcore Parody
Brad Armstrong’s parody of the ’90s super-hit is sheer entertainment. Script, acting, direction, sex performance and — crucially — makeup and special effects combine for a superb example of couples-friendly porn. Randy Spears and Ethan Hunt take the Tommy Lee Jones-Will Smith roles of Kay and Jay, U.S. agents in charge of investigating space aliens. The thread of a story-line involves them tracking down the disappearance of earth girls somewhere into space. To solve the mystery it’s necessary for Jay to undergo an electronic sex change. He’s turned into the delectable Misty Stone, who does a killer masturbation with her new pussy.
There is lots of funny stuff with the bizarre-looking aliens, plus a quartet of talking Peckerhead puppets, and Kaylani Lei gets to have three tits. Tommy Pistol, with a freakishly enlarged head, nose and ears, has his way with Isis Taylor. The hottest sex scene would be the anal between Alektra Blue as a dominatrix and Xander Corvus as a submissive with an extra head. The movie ends with an orgy with the MiB guys and the abducted women, along with Jessica Drake as a “Vaginarian.” The humor is sparked and driven by Spears’ dryly comic performance. Easily one of the best XXX releases of 2012. —Jared Rutter, XBIZ Editors Choice
Men In Black: A Hardcore Parody is available at:
Dark Knight XXX: A Porn Parody
Director Axel Braun’s “Dark Knight XXX” sets the bar for adult parody filmmaking for a variety of reasons, including its inspired make-up and wardrobe, visually engaging and fun set design and formidable acting and performing talent. However, most impressive is Braun’s ability to present a parody that is faithful to its source while bringing fresh ideas to the table and never — not once — forgetting that it’s still a porno.
Directing from a script he co-wrote with Mark Logan, Braun covers a lot of the groundwork laid in Christopher Nolan’s “Dark Knight” trilogy with a taut, satisfying story that allows for creative and bold sex scenes guaranteed to get comic-geeks and cos-play enthusiasts off for years on end.
“Dark Knight XXX” finds Bruce Wayne (Giovanni Francesco) living in self-imposed exile away from Gotham City in a cabin high up in the snow-crested mountains. He regrets his Batman alter ego, believing it has led to the rise of more dangerous, bloodthirsty criminals eager to destroy all he holds dear. Unfortunately, Wayne’s plans to brood in peace are disrupted when Catwoman (Aiden Ashley) informs him that a terrorist by the name of Bane (Derrick Pierce) has taken his ex-fiancée, Kathy Kane (Andy San Dimas), hostage. Wayne has no choice but to return to Gotham as the caped crusader.
While the film’s CGI and fight sequences leave a lot to be desired, the acting performances are the best to be found in adult. Francesco as Wayne/Batman emotes torment and sorrow (and does a pretty good job of mimicking the Dark Knight’s barking tone). Brendon Miller does a remarkable job of channeling the late Heath Ledger’s Joker, madcap mayhem and all. His onscreen partner Penny Pax also shines as Batgirl Barbara Gordon, Commissioner Gordon’s daughter.
Miller and Pax also share the film’s kinkiest and hottest scene, in which the Joker ass-fucks Batgirl while her father, imprisoned in a cage, helplessly watches nearby. Batgirl hopes that The Joker will show mercy and release them in exchange for submitting to his deviant desires, but is instead rewarded with a bullet to the spine. A three-way with Bane, Catwoman and Kathy Kane is also rewind-worthy.
“The Dark Knight XXX” was produced months before the release of Nolan’s “The Dark Knight Rises,” the third and final film in the Warner Bros. franchise, leaving Braun blind to that film’s storyline. But fear not, Braun and Logan leave their take on the Dark knight legend open ended for more sequels to come. —XBIZ Editors Choice
Dark Knight XXX: A Porn Parody is available at:
Dallas XXX: A Parody
Aficionados of the long-running series will respond to this one best. The parody element is kind of hit and miss. Sometimes the show’s campy excesses are really nailed but at other times — as in the long dialogue scenes that set up the “plot” — it seems like just an attempt at drama that doesn’t quite get there. The only overt gag is having Miss Ellie played by a man.
Still, the movie is well shot and the cast is quite good. Alexis Ford is perfect for horny Lucy and looks fetching in two sex scenes. Bobbi Starr is a hoot as neurotic nymphomaniac Sue Ellen. She seems to be having loads of fun and her scene with the “tall handsome cowboy” (Michael Vegas) she picks up in a bar is the best in the movie. The sex in general, as in most parodies, is somewhat by the numbers.
Eric Masterson is a bit small-scaled for the villainous J.R. Ewing, more like a mean petty crook than a wicked wheeler-dealer. But James Deen’s self-righteous Bobby Ewing is spot-on and even funny. And there are several good non-sex cameos. It ends with J.R. being shot, setting up a possible “Who Killed J.R.?” sequel.
Dallas XXX: A Parody is available at:
Another excellent Axel Braun adventure from Vivid Superheroes. Hitting the street after the release of the smash hit movie, it’s really a parody of the comics the film was based on. Director Braun roped in a fine cast to play the avenging heroes — they’re out to get The Hulk (Jordan Lane, non-sex).
There’s Brooklyn Lee as Black Widow, Danni Cole as Scarlet Witch, Lexi Swallow as Miss Marvel. Team leader is Nick Fury, incarnated by Lexington Steele. Brendon Miller overacts hilariously as Thor and gets to fuck former WWF star Chyna, as She-Hulk, whose sturdy bod is painted green. Spider-man tries to join the gang but at first they won’t let him. Xander Corvus reprises his role as Spidey and trades barbs with Dale DaBone as Iron Man Tony Stark. When he fucks Miss Marvel she tells him, “You have an image problem.”
There’s only about 16 minutes of story, but it’s all great fun. The rest is sex, and the sex is good. Steele, an imposing screen presence, has the only anal scene, with Phoenix Marie. “The Avengers” somehow wind up at the Arctic Circle where they find Capt. America embedded in ice. Obviously, the story doesn’t stop here.
Avengers XXX is available at:
Real Housewives of South Beach
Pleasure Dynasty is proving to be a formidable force in the parody market. The Florida-based upstart has already impressed with its hot and clever takes on Martin Scorsees's Taxi Driver and Antonie Fuqua's Training Day. Now it's ready to spoof reality TV. The target: The Real Housewives of Miama. The Bravo reality series about rich trophy housewives and bitchy business women living in Miami, is rich for parody and gets a proper send-up from director Dana Dane, working from a very funny script by Dick Chibbles.
Real Housewives Of South Beach is available at:
American Werewolf in London XXX
Strong comedic performances, imaginative camerawork and campy old-school horror effects and make-up are just some of the reasons why director Jim Powers’ parody of “An American Werewolf in London” may keep viewers sitting around waiting to see how it will all end. The 1981 John Landis horror-comedy couldn’t be better suited for Powers’ brand of madcap moviemaking. Not only does he do a deft job of recreating memorable scenes and shots from the original, but even manages to make them more outrageous and hilarious.
Plot wise, Powers keeps things relatively familiar. Richie and Dane Cross play David Kessler and Jack Goodman, two American college buddies backpacking through England’s Yorkshire moors. A werewolf attacks them, leaving Jack dead and biting David just minutes before it’s gunned down by nearby townsfolk. David is taken to a hospital where he is plagued by a boner that won’t go away, visions of his dead friend and extremely creepy surreal night terrors, one of which finds mutant Nazi lesbians murdering his family in their home before smacking clams on their kitchen counter.
The sequence is a very funny nod to the mutant Nazi nightmare David has in the original. Riley Jensen and Brett Rossi play the mutant dykes while wearing horrific masks and nothing else. Oddly enough, the scene plays out both disturbing and sexy. Jack’s ghost warns David that things will only get worse once the moon is full, and that he should kill himself to spare the deaths of innocents. Of course, it takes awhile for David to accept this.
Utilizing shaky-cam techniques, Powers captures the havoc and horror werewolf David unleashes on London to great effect. Kudos to the producers for allowing Powers to shoot in London. Those shots are amazing and great fun to watch. —Nelson X, XBIZ Editors Choice
American Werewolf in London XXX is available at:
Spider-Man XXX: A Porn Parody
2012 AVN Award Winner for
Casual fans of the Spider-Man franchise might not have intimate knowledge of the characters named and portrayed in this parody, but that won't stop them from enjoying everything from the storyline to the hot sex scenes.
Spider-Man XXX: A Porn Parody is available at:
Star Wars XXX: A Porn Parody
2013 AVN Winner for Best Screen play (Parody), Best supporting Actor (Tom Bryon), Best Art Direction, Best Director (Axel Braun), Best Selling Title of 2012
As with any great porn parody the quality of the sex is as high as the parody. With 6 sex scenes you get a lot of fuck for your buck and a good variety of sex scenes which fit into the narrative and delicious detours. The sex here is top notch and Vivid hasn't softened it down at all with a solid amount of anal action. The best of the scenes are the orgy in Mos Eisley's Cantina and the Wookie Sex Scene.
Star Wars XXX is available at:
Elvis XXX A Porn Parody
2012 AVN Award Winner for
The gyrating pelvis and shaking leg of Elvis used to pass for obscene, resulting in a call for a boycott of his music on moral grounds. The religious right got their asses handed to them in that battle of the cultural wars as Elvis survived their harassment to transcend from rock star to American myth and legend and a very appropriate subject for a porn tribute.
There’s plenty of works about Elvis to draw from but director Axel Braun seems to have focused on the 2005 television mini- series, not that it matters because the characters are familiar to everyone and that makes this sexualized retelling of Elvis’ life even more fun. In addition to watching Elvis thrust his pelvis far more than he ever did on the “Ed Sullivan Show,” we get to see Ann Margaret (Lexi Belle), Marilyn Monroe (Codi Carmichael), Natalie Wood (Jessie Palmer, in her first anal), and Priscilla Presley (Andy San Dimas) fucking the way we see them in our fantasies. [DVD includes a non-sex party version]
The King (sorry Bill Margold, even John Holmes must step aside when Elvis takes the stage) is played by two performers; J. Jay does have a passing resemblance to Young Elvis but Dale DaBone nails the role of Vegas Elvis in all of its rhinestone glory.
Naturally, there’s adult-themed songs based on Elvis’ standard that are both humorous and well-produced. Tyler Knight turns in an excellent performance as Muhammad Ali although he’s outshone by Asa Akira and Jessica Bangkok, two whores that Elvis drops off as presents (Elvis was all about presents). Asa and Jessica work well together, working over Tyler with a ferocity that makes the scene worth watching multiple times. Thank you, thank you very much. —Scott Ross, XBIZ Editors Choice
Elvis XXX A Porn Parody is available at:
Beverly Hillbillies XXX
Ellie Mae Clampett from the Beverly Hillbillies is one of the television's sexiest characters; she's a naive blonde beauty with a bubbly personality and a penchant for shirts that emphasize her buxom breasts -- and she's a pretty good rifle shot too. She is the stuff of many a masturbation fantasy. So obviously the most important concerns in a porn parody of the 60's sitcom are who's going to play Ellie Mae and how awesome is her sex scene.
Beverly Hillbillies XXX is available at:
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